Urban Legend?: Welcome to BuckeyeNation, Mr. Meyer. Stay healthy.
Stretching The ScapeGoat: Ryan Pontbriand. Browns Pro Bowl field goal snapper being released due to a couple of snap snafus in the past three weeks. Yeah, it’s all the long snapper’s fault the Cleveland Browns are football’s version of the Chicago Cubs…
Welcome to Monday Mayhem!
The ultra-late version of Friday Fun Fact.
Although The Committee approved holding this episode until this coming Friday, our creative writing team was re-inspired to ship this out for distribution while watching vignettes of Monday Night Football in between commercial programming…
Somewhere between Halloween’s hangover and Black Friday, they started. And, they haven’t stopped. Like Freddy Krueger’s nifty razorblade glove scraping against the boiler room pipes, Christmas commercials have infiltrated every television program from morning time to prime time. There’s no escaping them, except during infomercials.
“I wonder if these heavy eyes can face the unknown.”
Some are obnoxious, like the ones from the infamous & alleged biggest box store on the planet. Not only are they obnoxious (which by the way, in Marketing terms makes it memorable), but the added “bonus” is they are played over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and… you get the point.
Some are funny, like the “Game On, Santa” campaign brought forth to us from my personal investment firm, Best Buy. These are a new twist on the Christmas theme, in which the lady of the house trumps Santa by getting all of the gifts, drinking his milk, and leaving but one stocking to fill – the dog’s.
And then some are down right (I say “downright!) ridiculous! I’m talking a specific set of car ads. Have you had the chance to see any of these yet? The actors in the ads are given a car for Christmas. And the surprise is delivered by a loved one who has MacGyver’d some way to play the car company’s theme song – either in a music box, cell phone, or yes, Guitar Hero.
The question is not the absurdity of the ads, but how many ways Friday Fun Fact can slice and dice these trinkets. Well, let’s give it a go:
- If you know the car ad jingle enough to pick it out, you watch WAY TOO MUCH television
- If you know the car ad jingle and this is what matters to you in life, you may need to examine your priorities
- If you actually think you are going to be surprised with a car as a Christmas gift, YOU may need to be examined. Really?! Who expects this?!
- And going further down that road, what risk would someone be taking by getting someone a car for Christmas? The color could be wrong; it might not have Bluetooth, tires, etc.
- Who the h-e-double-hockey-stick makes the big bow displayed on the cars in the commercials? Do you drive home with the ribbon on top?
- And, what exactly is the demographic here? ESPECIALLY in a down economy! I know there are some people that the economy hasn’t affected. I’m not sure if I know too many of them.
- Oh, and Guitar Hero?! AND you recognize the jingle?! AND you stop playing and start crying?! You’re going to lose the game! “You play to win the game!”
I am positive Your Readership has its own “favorite” Christmas commercials. I’m already not sure if I can take it anymore. Maybe the Dream Warriors can help me through this nightmare…
Tunes of the Week:
Santa Clause Is Coming To Town – Benny Goodman / Bruce Springsteen
Dream Warriors – Dokken
Do You Hear What I Hear – Bing Crosby / Whitney Houston
Cars – Gary Numan
All I Want For Christmas – Mariah Carey
Santa Baby – Eartha Kitt / Madonna
Raise A Seasonal Glass!
May Your Monday Mayhem Be Followed By A Friday!
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